Skidding Into Home Plate

We are now in the home stretch.

My son and me, that is.

It is May and that means high school graduation is officially three weeks from today. He's counting down the days as we speak (or type, in my case).

The job search for myself is also taking off and hopefully landing somewhere wonderful soon. Tomorrow I have two job interviews at two different types of salons. One is a corporate-type facility while the other is a private, very upscale salon. Each type has its perks, but if all goes well and the vibe is right, I'd love to have the luxury of leaning toward the private salon.

For most of my life, I have worked the corporate lifestyle and mentality. Time is never one's own and your value is determined by someone else.

Not that I'm into money alone, mind you. I've had some wonderful jobs where I got paid well.

But it's just that the time/money thing is so heavily connected that you don't have the freedom to really live. Part of my doing the cometology thing is to finally gain back some of my own life and be able to live again. That's really hard to do in a corporate environment.

So if all goes well, I'm hoping for a chance at the private salon. It will be an enormous risk, something that is a real struggle right now. But with risk comes the chance for reward. Plus it gives me another opportunity to show my son that mindset not just in word but in deed.

So here's hoping for sunny skies ahead these next few days and weeks. I'll let you know when I skid into home plate.

Beware of the Ides of March

March is becoming crazier by the minute!

So if my looming graduation and employment search aren't heavy enough, let's see how much more we can toss into the heap.

My son has been frantic with scholarship applications/interviews/auditions. There's a few small, local scholarships that he's writing essays for, but the big ones are his vocal and video production auditions. Decisions will be made soon and we've got to find time to squeeze a few more opportunities into the schedule before they slip away.

Then there's trying to get my taxes done so that we can file for his FAFSA considerations before the April 1st deadline (don't you find it interesting that April Fool's Day is the deadline for financial aid considerations - hmmm). That's becoming quite an interesting bear in and of itself.

In order for me to be able to pay the bills and go to school at the same time, I've had to liquidate my investments and the majority of my retirement. Now comes the tax bill. Only once have I ever had to pay into State but never Federal. This year is changing that and scaring me to death.

But it's got to be done in order to have any hope of my son receiving grant money to help pay for college expenses in excess of scholarships. Now the question is how the tax man is going to get paid.

Another hurdle to overcome in this amazing year.

So with my graduation, my employment search, taxes due, my son's scholarship deadlines, FAFSA deadline, his graduation, etc., etc., etc., I'm really feeling the pressure this month.

Beware of the Ides of March!

Here's hoping I won't suffer the same fate as Caesar.

The Shoes Can Pinch

Here I am on the cusp of starting a new job, trading the unemployment shoes for the stilettos. For some reason, my excitement seems to be waning.

The job still excites me. It's going to be fast-paced and freedom loving in that I'll be responsible for the entire office and for running down business instead of being tied to a desk. This is the chance I've dreamed of for many years.

There's just one small problem - I wish so badly that I could offer jobs to all of my friends who remain out of work.

There are so many I know who have been laid-off and out of work for as many months as I. My church choir is back this Wednesday after six weeks off, but the loft is full of the unemployed. It almost makes me feel guilty to share my good news.

My son's best buddy - his dad has been out of work for almost four months with nary a nibble and their family is about two months away from exhausting their savings and being forced to sell their home. They only have seven years left to pay on it, but with no income they couldn't qualify for a loan to extend the term and lower their monthly outflow. They're now looking outside the state for employment opportunities.

Don't get me wrong - I'm so very thankful to be once again on the threshold of the gainfully employed, and just at the right time. God came through for us once again. But it's sure hard to get excited when so many have a hard time hearing my good news.

I almost feel bad saying anything to anyone, as if they might get the mistaken impression that I'm rubbing it in their faces.

Couldn't be further from the truth.

I'm finding it best to temper my enthusiasm with compassion and understanding. After all, I want God to get the glory for His masterful work in our lives.

However, I also want to be sensitive to those who are hurting and in dire circumstances. I was in their shoes until mere days ago.

And sometimes those shoes pinch while you're in them.

New Phase of Life

Throughout this new phase of my life called unemployment, I've been trying to stay focused on the positives.

One of the ways in which I'm doing that is by working out like a crazy woman. Usually in the past I've hopped on the treadmill after work for about twenty or thirty minutes, three or four times a week. That kept the blood flowing and me feeling good.

But that was when I was working.

Now that I have the time for a more intensive workout, I'm really hitting the treadmill and weights alot harder every single day. The main reason I'm doing this is to keep my endorphins up so that I don't get down in the dumps about not having a job right now. Plus it gives me something to fill part of my schedule when I'm not sitting at the computer typing cover letters and printing envelopes to mail my resume.

When we found out we were getting laid off earlier this year, some of the information I read talked about the pounds that alot of people put on. Of course, I knew I wouldn't be able to afford to replace my wardrobe without a salary, so I decided then that I was not going to be one of those individuals.

So I've been working the treadmill on higher speeds, inclined, for longer and longer periods of time. Pulled out my pilates DVD and refamiliarized myself with some of the moves so that I could do them without the DVD and instead watch a little TV while working out.

After nearly three months, I'm starting to notice some real changes.

Gosh, has it been three months already? Gee!

My stamina has increased substantially. It's even affected my singing. Initially my thighs started to bust out of my jeans from building up muscle so quickly, but now it seems they're starting to slim back down and really tone up.

The place I've really noticed it is in my waist. The thighs of my jeans may be getting tighter but the waist of my jeans is getting pretty loose. Hey, this is kinda fun!

So instead of gaining weight it appears I may be losing it.

Now if I can just gain me some employment - here's hoping!

To Do Or Not To Do

Tonight I'm feeling a little torn.

I've been talking to a friend of mine all week concerning coming into her shop and helping her with managing her employees, teaching them some soft-sell techniques, marketing skills, etc. We're planning to meet Monday to finalize things for me to get out of the house and work with her until more permanent employment comes my way.

The plan is basically that I would volunteer my time until she could pay me something for my work. She'd scratch my back a bit and I'd scratch hers. My goal is to help out a dear friend in difficult circumstances and also to help keep myself sharp.

This evening I received a call from my former boss. He and his wife were out to dinner with another couple and they brought up my current problems with trying to find additional lucrative employment. One of them made a call to someone they know and - BOOM - they want me to come in next week.

I should be overjoyed. I should be excited.

Actually I was more excited to try and help out my friend. Be an entrepreneur for a little while and get my feet wet.

The entrepreneurial bug bit me long ago. For the last ten years my life has been involved with helping small businesses, government relations, etc. I've learned so many things and had the opportunity for experiences I'd never before chanced.

It also made me excited about someday going into business for myself. For now, I just didn't have the guts to do it with the responsibilities of my son, my home, etc.

After being laid-off from the corporate world, I actually have been excited about helping a small business directly - utilizing so many of the skills I've learned throughout my life. Even though it's scary, what do I have to lose right now? Absolutely nothing!

So now I'm faced with the possibility that I may have to choose between going back into corporate America or the excitement and hard work necessary to see the backbone of America succeed.

Tough position at the moment. Well all I can do is see what they've got to offer. My friend could still use my help on the side or at least during the time I have left at home.

Then again, I could choose to take the risk, throw the known aside and head into the frightening yet exciting world of entrepreneurship.

Prayers would be appreciated right about now.

Cats Make Great Writer's Block

Cats make great writer's block.

Instead of looking for a new job today, I decided to spend the entire time at the computer creating an agent contact listing in preparation for querying agents about my book. Throughout the day, one of my cats kept climbing up into my lap and then onto the desk - right in front of my computer screen.

Heck, one time he even tried grabbing the pointer on the screen. I kept spinning it around in circles, hoping it would make him dizzy and he'd get off the desk.

Worked about as good then as it is doing now. At the moment, I'm having to peek around the cat and hoping my fingers are on the correct keys.

My writer's block has cleared!!!

So where was I? Oh yes - spent the day studying literary agents and compiling an Excel spreadsheet with their contact information. Tomorrow I'm going to clean up and sharpen the first few chapters a little bit, send out several queries via email, then spend some time on Career Builder seeing if there are some applicable job postings.

Have to admit, I'm feeling a little torn. Right now I wish I was in a position to take some extended time off to really devote to my writing and selling of my book(s). I'm seeing this layoff as a real opportunity to switch gears somewhat and focus - maybe even doing something completely different.

But there's still the mortgage and utilities to be paid. Financially I'd be in a sweet position if the markets hadn't tanked the last few months. If worse had come to worse, I could have just cashed in some of my 401k and paid off the house.

Magic mirror on the wall, I wish you'd told the future!

Even so, I think I can combine my efforts during the possible weeks I'll be off work (please, not months) and take advantage of having the time to really push my book(s) as well as search for work. The technological age does have many benefits, doesn't it?

Last year a friend of mine made the leap from full-time employment to full-time writing. Lucky stiff! He and his wife spent a few years preparing as a lead-in to taking this step and getting bills paid off and finances in order, etc. However, his wife still maintains her job and they're making it just fine.

Guess that's why it's a little hard for me to take such a step of faith, since I am the sole provider of my family. The pressure was always there, but it didn't feel so heavy until I was without paycheck.

Just want to use this time wisely while I have it. I'll find gainful employment again - I'm just not sure if I should stay with what I know or take a risk and try something new.

Maybe even something totally new.

I'll treasure this time eventually someday. Maybe I'll be able to write about it then too.

Well, I guess that might work - as long as I don't continue to have this writer's block problem.

Final Day Approaches

Tomorrow is it.

Yep, my last day. There was an impromtu cry-fest this morning between myself and one of my dear co-workers. She and I have shared many stories, counseled and comforted one another over the last ten years. She's seen my son grow up from a little six-year-old child to a wonderful and handsome young man.

It's sure hard to believe sometimes that it's been that long!

Not sure yet how to feel about all this. I've accepted it. I'm ready to move on in many ways, to take a chance while I have it. But I will also desperately miss the working relationships we've built over the years.

We're more than co-workers. We're like family.

And like family we'll go our separate ways, but know we'll see each other every once in awhile. I'm already planning a get-together over here at my home for some homemade lasagna (lots of cheese!). Perhaps next month.

There's a list already begun to ensure we all have current and updated email, home and cell numbers. A couple of us have moved this past year, so we need to make sure our addresses are current with each other too.

I'm comforted to know that this isn't forever. We'll see each other again real soon.

Maybe I'll invite them over to see the movie at the end of the month. :-)