Take Me Up To Cloud Nine

Today was so much fun.

This morning, my sister, niece, and great-niece all came up to visit and have a girls day of frivolity and hair. We started off with a visit to the State Beauty Supply in town, lunch at a local restaurant, and back to my house for cutting, coloring, and highlighting all afternoon.

Twas a blast indeed. :-)

To be completely frank, I needed a day to play and do some hair. Finding the right fit in where to work has been more difficult than I imagined it would be. I've spent weeks sending out resumes, interviewing, and am ready to accept a position. However, all of this time away from the chair has put me into a bit of a tailspin.

The questions mount in my mind:

Am I really qualified to work on the public and get paid for it?
Am I ready for the State Board practical exam in Topeka?
Why should someone hire me right out of school?
Did I really get the most out of my schooling?
Why does it still take me so long to complete people's hair?

And on and on it goes.

That's why today was so special. Not only did I get to play hair with my sister and niece, not only did they actually trust me to do a good job, but we just enjoyed each other's company.

And their hair looked great when I was done! I really was proud of the job I did. The whole time I was relaxed and comfortable and never once worried if I was doing something right or not. My foils looked just like puffy little pillows, the way they're supposed to look. The haircuts fell just right and shaped their faces beautifully. Take me up to cloud nine.

So after waking up this morning wondering if I was ever going to really feel like I could make it in this industry, tonight I go to bed knowing I will.

I have my family to thank for that.

Faith and Fear

Graduation is fast approaching!

This time I mean me from cosmetology school. My son's graduation will follow shortly upon its heels but at the moment I've got alot of decisions to make for myself first.

Isn't it amazing that in just two and ahalf months I will be taking up the mantle of cosmetologist and accepting my professional grade shears from school? It's so freaking AWESOME!

Sorry - I am an 80's child remember.

So several options lay before me, but I'm having trouble throwing one very risky venture aside - that of establishing my own salon. My original plan called for me to work about three years in a salon to learn additional trade secrets and then to open my own place. Then that changed to maybe two years. Recently I decided to re-evaluate after one year. But now faith is taking a stranglehold on me.

There seem to be some other things happening in the heavens that may be pointing in the direction of sooner rather than later. Much sooner. I can't yet share all of those specific things yet, but I've been deep in prayer concerning this possibility. Some of my close family and friends have also committed to praying for leading in this regard as well.

I'm scared to death!!!

But I'm also jazzed about the possibility of becoming a small business owner in a short amount of time. The decision needs to be made very soon.

Any of you praying readers out there are invited to join with me in seeking the Lord's direction.

And whatever direction that may be, I'll step out in faith - regardless of my fear.

Welcome 2011

It is with great joy that I spit goodbye to 2010 and wholeheartedly embrace 2011.

This first day of 2011 has been fun and relaxing, unlike this time last year when all you-know-what was breaking loose in my family. First there was my mother's cancer diagnosis confirmation, followed shortly by my grandmother's (mom's mom) death. Then the seemingly endless chemo treatments, job layoff, the unexpected loss of mom's best friend, etc., etc., etc.

But then again there were some glimpses of light even in the midst of absolute chaos and darkness.

Even though it was difficult to lose my grandma, it also seemed to be time. Please don't take that as being cold and unfeeling, but my mom was responsible for Grandma's visitation and care and with the looming surgery, recovery, then chemo it was time for someone else to step in.

That someone else ended up being the Lord, as He took her home to be with Him. He is, after all, the best caretaker anyone could need. Grandma ended up in good Hands.

The job loss also had a bright spot - it allowed me to be more available to my mom when she needed it and not just when it was convenient for the job situation. I didn't have to feel constantly torn between my responsibilities to work and my God-given responsibilities to my mom. It has also given me a chance to embrace a new calling and explore the possibility of realizing a long-held dream.

I've yet to come up with a positive light shined on the loss of Mom's best friend, but perhaps that's one that will have to wait until reaching the other side. There's some questions that will never be adequately answered until we have a chance to ask them face-to-face.

I hope God has a way to duplicate my questions in my notebook. Heck, He already knows them.

So many difficult things have happened this past year, and yet each one seems to have driven me closer to the Lord's feet. I can definitely say I've laid prostrate there so much of this past year. I guess that's another positive that's come from the difficulties myself and my family have faced. It gives greater meaning to the hurts.

And greater hope for the future. Welcome 2011!

Feeling A Little Devious

I've got a secret! I've got a secret!

And I can hardly wait to let my family in on it this coming weekend. Well and some of my friends this Tuesday evening. It will be interesting to see the reactions I get.

You see I've done something I never thought I'd do. Not going to share it with you all, my dear readers, until after my family has had a chance to get in on the secret first.

Then the cat will be out of the bag, so to speak.

So that's all I'm going to say about it right now. Look for my post next Saturday or Sunday after I return home from the family Christmas in Oklahoma. It will be then that I'll share my secret with you - and let you know of the priceless reactions from said family members. I'll treasure them for a lifetime, I'm sure.

Just a little devious that way. :-)

Christmas Life

The Christmas season has officially begun!

At least around our house anyway. :-)

Mom and Dad brought my son home and spent the rest of the weekend with us as tradition dictates. We've got our tree up and in the water, presents purchased, and I'm getting ready to start doing some decorating around the house.

Now if only I could keep up with the dishes and dusting.

Christmas is typically my favorite time of year (Independence Day a close second), but this year it feels a little more mellowed for some reason. A year ago brought alot of heartache and upset right around this time with my mother's cancer diagnosis followed swiftly by my grandma's passing (mom's mom). Eleven years ago this Christmas Eve was also the time my dear grandpa passed away. There seems to be alot of hurt attached to this time of year anymore.

Back when I was married (sooo many moons ago) I was just starting out in the banking industry and didn't have enough seniority to get time off at Christmas. My husband's family lived in Nebraska and he would take off a week or two and go up to see them. I'd go a couple of hours south and drive back Christmas night.

I remember vividly that first Christmas night driving back home all alone. As I entered the city, it was eerie in its silence and disturbing in its darkness. Nary a car was in sight as I roamed the streets and pulled into the garage. Walking into the empty house brought such pangs of loneliness of which I've rarely experienced since.

My ex and I never spent a single Christmas together.

Which is why after the divorce, Christmas became my favorite holiday once again. I had no good Christmas memories from my marriage to cloud my future happy holidays.

But 1999 muddied the waters for awhile after the loss of my very best friend forever and ever between Thanksgiving and Christmas that year and then the passing of my grandpa that Christmas Eve. It was several hard years after that before Christmas again became a festive time for us.

So even though there's rather a mellowed sense of the season this year, there's also so much life to celebrate in that Mom is doing great and my family continues to draw close to one another through these tough times.

And isn't new life what we're really celebrating at Christmas anyway?

That's what I thought.

A Thanksgiving Remembered

Thanksgiving day is dwindling - it's hard to believe it is almost over, it came so fast.

Drove back from my sister's in Oklahoma tonight all by myself. It's been somewhat of a tradition for the past eighteen years.

Since I've been in banking, I've almost always worked the Friday after Thanksgiving and taken off time at Christmas - a trade-off, if you will. During those early years, I never had a babysitter to watch my son that day, so my mother started coming back with me either Thursday night or would bring my son back and drive up Friday sometime after Thanksgiving. Then we'd spend time that weekend getting our tree, decorating our house, and doing a little shopping if we felt brave enough to tackle the crowds.

So even though my son is grown, my mom still comes back with us for the weekend to help us get ready for our Christmas - this year because I have school. It's become one of our many family traditions now.

Today we had a wonderful time at my sister's, ate a ton, took a nap, watched a movie (An Old Fashioned Thanksgiving) while the guys watched football. One of my nephews was home from Minnesota and a niece and great-niece were there from Arkansas, so I knew my son would want to hang out with them for awhile. So I said goodbye, will see my son and parents tomorrow, and chucked myself home for the night.

Sometimes I love the drive all by myself. The night sky was beautiful tonight and traffic wasn't all that bad amazingly enough. Tonight was a time for thinking. Just another month and it will be a year since our lives fell apart with my mother's cancer. But looking at her today, her hair is thick and getting longer all the time. She's regaining more and more of her health each and every day. Maybe someday soon I'll be able to look at her without worrying anymore or feeling the need to see if she's doing alright. It's really hard to believe it's been almost a year. So much has changed, and yet there is an element of peace in the family once again.

And THAT is something well worth giving thanks for this Thanksgiving.

Time To Settle In

Ah - it feels as if things might finally be settling in.

Besides the cold weather outside.

This morning I awoke feeling refreshed and energetic for the first time since starting my new job. There's always so much to deal with in a new job with a new company, and I knew it would take some time. I'd even warned my son when I started the new job that I'd probably be somewhat out of commission for the first two months.

Ha!

I made it in less time.

At least one week less, but who's counting?

Years ago I settled on the practical side of reality. I've learned my limitations, but that doesn't stop me from continuing to push the envelope. Along with the joys and excitement of starting anything new and out of the ordinary, there's always going to be a period of adjustment. Even though I expected it doesn't mean I enjoyed it.

But this week I finally felt myself step across the threshold to embrace the confidence of the new position.

Think I'm going to make it.

No - I know I'm going to make it. I've never been one to do anything halfway. So now that the job is beginning to smooth out, I'm excited to once again embrace my wonderful friends who have so patiently been waiting in the wings, cheering me on to success.

And that includes you too, my dear and patient readers.

Now it's time to settle back into my writing. Look out, blogging world - I'm back!

Stress and Trials (and Bears, Oh My)

Ah my fellow travelers - how I've missed turning the pages of a good yarn with you.

Life has been rather chaotic these last six weeks, what with the new job, my son starting his junior year of high school, etc.

He's been enormously busy with his choir group already. Our small town has an annual fall festival to celebrate our history and to just have some fun. The group sang at the festival on Thursday night. Then Friday they spent all day at an area university for their district choir workshops. Next week they will be having their annual fundraiser dinner and concert.

After that I don't remember.

New beginnings are always quite busy and a tad stressful. I'm seeing that my son's junior year has been quite a blessing for him, regardless of how busy he is. It's good to see him sacrificing a little of himself to be a part of something greater.

For me, I find myself in a teeny bit of a quandary. My old boss has given me some news that may or may not pan out. I've let him know that I'd be open to keeping in touch should things take a turn for the positive in that regard.

Not that I don't enjoy my new job - most of the people have been wonderful to work with and I've felt such a sense of camaraderie already with the majority of my team. The idea of leaving them is difficult to deal with at times. Maybe that won't happen.

But I really miss this group I worked with for more than ten years. We were more like a family in so many ways. I know I could get to that point again with this new company, but I don't know if I still possess the drive I once had to prove myself all over again. Forgotten what it's like and how much stress that entails.

Plus I ain't gettin' any younger.

Then again, I also miss writing and sharing in my blog. Funny how our priorities shift as we age, isn't it?

Holding Onto Family

Had a great evening tonight. We were invited to have dinner with a former co-worker and her husband at their new house and so they could see my son's pics from Europe.

It was interesting to reminisce about how my son was in kindergarten when I first started working with them. Sometimes he would come to the office with me when I had to take him to VBS or something and then he'd spend the afternoon drawing or reading after I picked him up. The whole gang got to watch him grow up.

So they were just about as excited for him as I was when he had this Europe opportunity pop up on the radar.

You know, I'll really miss working with the gang. Life must go on, but this is a group of people with whom I will strive to stay in contact. We went through alot together over the years and saw highs and lows in our personal lives. We felt like a family in many ways, and that's something you don't find very often.

I'm hoping that once again I will be blessed to add a new family unit into my life. But for the record, I plan to hold onto this one too.

Hitting the Road

Hitting the road this weekend.

My nephew is graduating out of town, so we're heading out in the morning to help celebrate his accomplishment. I haven't missed a single one of my nieces and nephews graduations.

I take great pride in that.

My family is very important to me, which is also why I'm heading back up the road a short ways for a family reunion thereafter.

Therefore, I will be out of commission a few days and then posting may be a bit sporadic at best for the remainder of next week with all the family around. It's going to be a week of blasting family fun.

Then I'll hit the road again and head for home.

I'm already anticipating the welcome we'll receive from the kitties.

Head Shots

Okay, Mom just sent a couple of pictures from the family Christmas. The second is of one of my sister's and myself (see bows on heads). This shows a decent shot of my new haircut if you don't let the black velvet collar fool you into thinking it's part of my hair. The first picture is of most of Mom and Dad's grandkids and great-grandkids.

Family Fun Forever

Like I said - didn't have a chance to commandeer the computer while at the extended family Christmas gathering.

So I'll let you know all about it today!

There were some great shots taken that show my hair, so by popular demand I'll be posting an updated photo with my new updo as soon as my mother emails a few to me or my son gets on our computer and downloads some from his camera.

Speaking of the new digital camera - we apparently got an AWESOME deal! It was something that was available only for the Christmas season and when they sold out they sold out (and they're sold out). It takes incredible pictures and my son has had a great time learning how it works.

By the way, he's actually a pretty good photographer, unbeknownst to me. He was watching scenery on the way down and back and taking some really neat shots with the lengthening shadows and golden sunbeams over the browning landscape. I'm looking forward to having a chance to see them full-size.

There's a couple of me and one of my sisters when we were being silly with our coffee mugs. I'll see if one of those turn out with a good shot of the haircut. Otherwise I'll just grab a few choice shots to share with you of our family fun.

My great-niece, Madison, was in full-walking-swing. She's become quite the little ham for the camera. There'll hopefully be some good photos to show of her too.

It was a busy and full weekend. Wouldn't trade those moments for anything. After all, friends come and go - family stays with us forever.

Wait a minute! Is that a good thing?

Smooth Sailing

In a couple of hours we'll be heading down to Oklahoma to visit the family. I'll probably be out of commission for a few days, unless I'm actually able to commandeer the computer from the kids.

Doubtful.

So our Christmas continues with (thankfully) clear skies and clear roads. Just the wind is present today to tickle our ears and noses.

It's Kansas - what can you expect?

So here's once again wishing you continued blessings with your families and friends as the Christmas season winds down and the New Year approaches.

Hopefully we won't have anymore strange roadway episodes with four new tires. Smooth sailing, you here?

Christmas Evening Observations

The household is winding down this evening from a wonderful and relaxing day. In my finite mind that's the best way to spend it.

When my son was young we used to go down to my parents' home on Christmas Eve and spend Christmas morning opening our gifts with them. Yet somewhere along the way I decided that my son and I needed to establish our own Christmas Day traditions in our home. He needed to see that even just the two of us were a family in our own right.

Those first couple of years were a little difficult. It felt lonely with no one else around. We'd open our gifts, I'd take a million pictures, and then I'd fix this fabulous Christmas dinner that only the two of us ate. Still it was important to me to establish ourselves as a bonafide family.

It was also important to me that we have some time to just relax without running hither and yon and feeling rushed to get this item checked off our list so we could do this and this and that and then leave to go here and there. Feels exhausting even now to think about it.

Over the years we've taken to occasionally inviting any other alone friends to come and eat Christmas dinner with us. Hey, we always have plenty of leftovers, so why not spread it around a little bit? Plus it helped for the day to feel less lonely.

However, now we've come to enjoy the slow and easy pace that has become our Christmas. Yes, we still get up early to open presents (after I fix my coffee). Yes, I still take a million pictures. And yes, I still cook an enormous (and fabulous) Christmas dinner. Sometimes we have friends join us and sometimes not.

This year was once again just the two of us and couldn't have been more wonderfuler (hee, hee). We were a little lighter on the presents but not on the love.

I spent the entire day in my new lavender lounging set (it IS my signature color, after all), cooked and ate Christmas dinner, then settled back for "It's a Wonderful Life" and another Hallmark Channel Christmas show. My son set up his great new stereo, played new games, and enjoyed all of his new stash.

Tomorrow we'll travel and be with others of our extended family. For today we were just our family.

And that was more than enough.

A Christmas Eve Memory

And so it is Christmas Eve.

I remember last year - our first year in our lovely new home. I was still so exhausted from the move and associated stressors that I didn't do a whole heck of alot of decorating except the tree.

It's kinda funny - this year we got our tree on time but due to rushing right from Thanksgiving to the play, we did not decorate it for two solid weeks. Felt a little bad, but the play took a bit of time (duh!).

So what do I find myself doing this Christmas Eve? Finishing decorating, of course. My boss was so kind since the weather was so bad last night that he told us since it was only going to be a half day to not worry about coming in this morning.

What a Merry Christmas present that was!

So with the extra time around the house today, I'm finally putting up a few more decorations and getting the stockings hung with care (we have no chimney). Then I'm going to bake a pumpkin pie, since it is the only kind my son likes, and then tonight we'll make Christmas cookies for Santa.

Okay, okay - I know my son is sixteen, but there are just some traditions that are still fun. We never did the "Santa" thing much anyway, but it's still neat to bake cookies together and spend that time having conversation or just being silly.

Isn't that one of the reasons for celebrating Christmas? Isn't family time what it's all about?

Makes me think of Mary and Joseph and the baby Jesus. Even before they were married, God started their family and still brought them together to raise His son as their own. Reminds me that God is as much in the little, ordinary, mundane things of life as much as the big things.

So enjoy this Christmas celebrating the gift of family as we remember the Holy Family this season.

Merry Christmas from Kansas!

Thanksgiving Memories

Glory be! Mom just sent me this picture of we girls at Thanksgiving. I love it!

After a busy morning of cooking and afternoon of eating and then cleaning up, we girls crashed on my humongous bed and watched sweet and sappy Christmas movies.

By the way, I really DO need to get my pictures back up on my walls in my bedroom. That wall behind us is completely blank. Did not realize how awful that looked. I need to take advantage of some coming time off to deal with the blank walls all around my house.

Anyway this picture sure does bring back the memories from those wonderful couple of days. Yes, I was tired when it was all over with but it was so absolutely fun while everyone was here that I didn't notice it at that time. I think everyone was happy and comfortable while here and we all had different areas of the house we could hang out in without crawling over each other and getting on each others nerves.

I know I'm quite capable of that, thank you. No comments from the Brian or Gary section in that regard.

Sure hope I have the luxury of hosting my family again. Well I do know I will in a couple more years when my son graduates from high school. Everybody better the heck come back or I'm going to hunt them down and drag them here!

Have a happy evening now, you here?

First Performance Down

The first performance is behind me. Sure going to miss it after tomorrow.

It's been very late nights all week. Last night I didn't get to bed until after midnight. Getting up for work this morning was just peachy.

Can you hear the sarcasm dripping from my voice? It's kinda hard for a girl who has learned to go to bed between 9 and 9:30. Maybe I should have taken vacation time this week too.

Couple of nights I left work and went straight to the church. Didn't see my son until breakfast the next morning. Kinda warned him that this was going to happen this week, but I have a feeling it's not just my kitties missing me.

It's kinda nice being missed, but I'll enjoy having a life with my son again.

Was very nervous early on but after the first scene I really got into it. Got into it so much that I cried more tonight in all the right places than I have any other time. Have to admit, I was afraid I'd be so nervous that I wouldn't be able to relax and get into the scene enough to cry.

No problemo.

Tonight some dear friends and co-workers came to see. Tomorrow there'll be even more friends, co-workers, and a little bit of family coming back to town to see the performance. I sure hope I can forget they're out there.

The pressure's on!

Peace

Well the family is all gone save Mom. She decided to stay and help us with getting our Christmas tree tomorrow.

It's an annual tradition we like to keep. :-)

Never have I felt so truly blessed with the joy of having most of my immediate family around me in my own home. My beautiful new dining table looked even more exquisite with my loved ones gathered around it. I believe everyone was comfortable with sleeping arrangements. The kids had fun playing video games, running around outside playing a version of hide and seek in the dark with black clothes, and then running out to our special movie theatre last night.

My sisters and our mom puttered around the kitchen with meal preparations and cleanup duties. Chores are so much more fun with family around. While the guys commandeered the television in the family room, Mom, my sisters, and I plopped like dollops of Cool Whip on my bed and watched our movies.

And I'm so glad I went the extra mile with two ovens!!!! We'd also have never survived without the extra fridge. The leftovers are packed in both, but we made a substantial dent in them today before everyone left. Out of seven pies we have just a few more pieces to finish off.

The smoked turkey went over great - was so glad I decided to have two different turkeys. Even got an amazing compliment on the dressing (thank you Stove Top for the base from which to start). Pam's cranberry salad was superb. Angie's chocolate pies were excellent, as usual. Then, of course, Mom's cream cheese mashed potatoes - aaaah! It was all heaven on a plate.

Now for the tree. Next weekend the play. Then we can relax and enjoy the Christmas season.

Tonight the snow is falling in lazy swirls. My hope is that with the holiday season upon us you will find joy and peace.

Merry Christmas!

Product Recommendation

Arrival day has arrived!

That sounded weird.

Oh well - Mom and Dad arrived safely last night while I was at play rehearsal (which is going pretty good, despite my unruly lungs). My sisters and their families will be arriving this afternoon into the early evening hours.

Still trying to get a few last minute things taken care of and have started tonight's dinner of chili with all the fixins. I'll try and get the turkeys in the oven today so they can be filling the air with the smells of Thanksgiving (no, I'm not getting up at 5:00 in the morning to cook the blasted turkeys tomorrow).

I finished up with the decorating yesterday when dusting was completed. Washing the china at the moment. It's times like these that I wonder why I bought so much china!

Nah, I love the stuff and getting it out to use. I'm not one of those who just likes displaying my wares - heck, the stuff was made to use so I grab every opportunity to pull it out and eat off of it. It'd be an awful waste of funds otherwise.

By the way - product recommendation!!!!! For all of you who have animals and are constantly trying to keep the furniture fur free, I have a solution. My niece, Abbie, is terribly allergic to cats and bunnies, and of course we have two cats (though they are indoors all the time and wonder if that makes any difference for her). So I've been trying to clean fur off of everything (and I mean EVERYTHING) for the past week or so.

When I went to Wal-mart on Sunday for my veggie items I came across this thing called a Fur Fighter from Scotch and remembered seeing something about it on TV recently. Snapped it up and figured it was worth giving it a try.

LOVE IT!!!! I used to use one of those roller sticky things that don't work that great, but this thing is AWESOME! It has these teeny tiny pricklies that grab the embedded fur and pulls it out with only a few swipes without damaging any sort of fabric. I used it on all the furniture and pillows and everything around the house and it worked like a charm. The real test will see how Abbie does when she sits down. :-)

Better run and finish my chores before everyone starts to get here in a few hours. Have a Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Off To The Races

The final push is on. I've spent all day today cleaning and preparing for guest arrivals. Mom and Dad come in tonight, while everyone else will be coming tomorrow afternoon/evening.

I can't believe it is finally almost here.

Lost alot of time yesterday running around trying to find my last few costumes for the play, but I cannot complain. DAV had some great period piece tweed suits actually from the 1940's. Found one that fit almost perfect, so my friend Lori is going to do a small amount of tweaking for me.

She should get a byline in the program for costume mistress. I'm a little hard to fit in a particular area so nothing fits quite right off the rack, especially clothes cut from a less generous time in our history, fashionably speaking. So Lori has gone with me on all my costuming expeditions since she's an expert seamstress. Great eye for details and tucks.

It's all beyond me.

Anyway, don't have alot of time to write tonight. The dinner bell is about to ring and the house still has a few areas that require attention.

Off to the races!